So I have a job *smiles and waves*. Ok, actually I have 4 jobs *bows*....I work at a horse farm.
It has been a blast and I am generally alone when I work so lots of time to think *will there be fishing in heaven?* *or hunting* *why did God create mares* *starts to cry* Yes, I am a country girl...no way out anymore. :) I mean, my job involves scooping poop. Ain't done in heels, I'll tell you that. So a couple weeks ago I was filling in for my friend and it turned out to be a craaazzzzyyyy day. Sit back and get ready to read my struggles. They are real folks.
My boss was down at the barn already...*gulps and keeps walking* She is great, nothing against her. Just pressure you know? A owner of one of the horses was in the tack room. We introduced and all that jazz and then I realized we were wearing the same sweatshirt......*gasps* *keeps a straight face*
"Oh hey, we have the same sweatshirt!" *smiles and ignores the fact about how creepy it was* *shivers*
So my boss said to me, "I know that you are supposed to be working *quickly starts mucking stalls* but would you mind babysitting our cat (Tigger) for us?" *blinks*
"Sure. What do you want me to do?" (my resume is going to be sooooo weird....babysits cats, climbs on combines, mows fields with windrower, packs a killer punch and can look 12 while being 18, *sighs*)
"Oh just call this number if you hear a cat fight. Sheba has tried to kill Tigger 2x now."
"okkkkaaayyyy......*unexperienced cat breaker upper against experienced killer cat* *GREAT* I'll keep my ears peeled."
Went back to mucking stalls. Everything was fine until I heard a cat meow. Awww, Tigger is meowing.....wait a minute. I should go and check on him.
I ran outside and there streaking towards little gray Tigger was Sheba. All black mass floating over the ground towards him. "SHEBA!!!!! STTOOOOPPPP!!!! NOOOOO!!" I ran over to the black and gray mess and quickly contemplated what to do. *looked at my hands* *nope* So I jumped up and down and yelled at Sheba. It worked!!! I grabbed Tigger and he let out the loudest, longest and deepest growl. Gah! So cute! I ran back into the barn and used the phone in the tack room. *whaaattttt?....it has a cord??? wonders never cease* They came down, brought Queen Sheba back to the house and lets just say I was highly praised. *grins smugly*
Anyways, I finally finished everything in the barn and it was time to bring the horses in. Always exciting....*little sarcasm little excitement* ok, confession....I almost got stomped on by a mare (don't ask how) and then got bitten by her when I tried to move her. #ihatemares They are really really really extremely messy. no joke. So, I brought one mare into the barn. She successfully slammed me into the door and knocking the wind out of me...and I didn't give her an apple. *sticks out tongue and runs* And everything went well despite the fact that the pony didn't fit into the halter. I could feel his disgust...*sighs*
So I was down to the last horse to bring in......drumroll please.....bbbbrrrrrrr. Her name is Tacit. Beautiful horse, messy stall. She wasn't coming when I called her *grrrrr* I stormed out into her pasture. "TACIT!!!! COME ON!!!! (I have a short temper) Picked her head up and kept eating....dragged myself over to her and tugged her to the gate. *yay* She starts to freak out! *I super hate you right now* *cries* She bolts down the path and back out to her field. Running around and neighing. Mood swing? Eventually she came back and let me put the halter on her.
This job has been fun...*smiles* but I still can't get up the manure hill to dump the wheelbarrow....*covers eyes and moans* It will be more exciting in the winter. This was all to say...this wouldn't have happened to me if I had filled in. But I did. And I am filling in again this upcoming week again!!
would you have filled in??
haaahaaaa NO. I can't stand cats -- especially when they're known for being nasty. like....NO WAY
ReplyDeletebut seriously, sounds like a job that never ceases to bring new surprises - which is fun ;) in a way. hahaa
but....Baloo?? you should come haha! ;)
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